chat

(07:14:57 AM) msn: one last thing, this is the most painful i'll ever tell you natalie. but you know what is this relax feeling that you have, that brightness that broke atillas paradigm? is the fact that you also had been developing feelings for you, feelings that are tainted by the pain of your previous relationship. so i'll be wishing for your happiness hoping to be strong too. maybe your point of view change in a dirrection i dont know, and i hope that considering that your vision is different of the one i met. be strong and make strong steps for your happiness and that mental peace you are always looking for my....

earth please eat me, why do i push her to another person who can fulfil her.. I want to cry now, but i become a bit stronger this days, yet i can barely move but i have to move on.
Please the force that kept me strong this days please helps me once more.

and the question finally came...

Oh n
you had stabbed me hard today. I knew that eventually that happens and now I feel like a prisoner waiting for her execution. I wish to the gods to give me strength to see you in your eyes and smile with your future happiness. Pain and love are together, maybe the pain in our relationship might bring you future joy you never expect that can exist. But ah, hurts so much to see that, i want to disappear. I thank you for asking me for advice anyways... if i feel like dying is better when i know what's going on...

lluvia, tus besos frios como la lluvia

hi,
rain in Panama is something amazing, is hot, but comforting. i don't know why people don't like it. indeed is healthier than German's rain and noisier too. is good to close your eyes and let it be, would you join me?

a day in the farm

N
today I was thinking on you this afternoon, what you would be doing and how might you feel. Do you think in me? Probably no, you should be having some entertainment somewhere else.
Here is not so different, I went to the farm to checkout some stuffs about the business and see the cows. The places looks not so different as it use to I wanted to have you there to see it, but probably you might feel overwhelmed by the difference of life.
In an instant, I was able to understand why the tropic looks so fascinating for you. Is so different to Europe that feels like living in a hot dream. The details of the nature become brilliant and in a moment you can feel so free.
See you there in the strong tropical hot wind with your eyes closing and your long hair dancing with the wing have to be a vision of reminiscence.

the begining of the conversation

to write here, might not implies to be response, but when the omission becomes the regular, it rots the soul. to keep some stuffs inside is an unnecessary luggage we accept to carry. this blog is to express those stuffs we want to say but in some cases we can reach the listener.